I moved in with a very good friend of mine in 2017. This girl was so many good things; a very good cook with a great sense of humour to mention but a few. We enjoyed our time together and the long conversations after work were to die for.
But like the saying goes, no one is perfect. This beautiful girl wasn’t perfect and neither was I. Our relationship was not always sugar, spice and everything nice, just like any other relationship, but, trust me, it was one of a kind.
When it was time for me to move house, I moved out carrying a heavy heart from the little mistakes and everything that didn’t go well as expected from her. IMAGINE!
At that the moment of farewell, I was all smiles but deep down I knew the moment I stepped out of the house, I was only going to check on her by a phone call or text. I didn’t want to be in her space again..’I thought’
This is the girl who welcomed me in her home and did everything in her power to make me smile every night I came back home. It was so unfair of me to stick to the sour salt of one meal after having been served a zillion delicious meals in her home. I forgot the oceans she crossed and mountains she climbed just to hold my hand.
In very many relationships, be it with friends or family, we rarely consider our people being as human as we are, Somehow, things don’t always go well with them and we tend to make things personal and hold onto their mistakes.
Most times when we do not forgive the little thing, we keep ourselves in prison. We hold ourselves captive to past mistakes and as a result we allow shame to come in and accuse us, to the point where we align our identity with some mistakes that we have made in the past and for reasons that make no sense we don’t forgive.
Unforgiveness is not an option. It’s toxic. It’s dangerous and leads to a place of disconnect with our Father. I thought that by not reaching out to my friend I was protecting myself but instead I ended up bitter.
God reminds us of His love and calls us into loving others, the way He loves us. No matter the amount of sin. The Bible says, as far as the East is from the West so I have removed your sins from you. Just imagine if He was a keeper of grudges!
So, moving forward, let’s reconsider, examine our relationships and make sure they are free of revenge and anxiety and evidence of ongoing disconnect.
It’s time for us to mature into a company of powerful people who know how to walk in freedom, practice intimacy and vulnerability , and invite people around us to become powerful and free love.